Undocumented - illegal immigration in NYC

Mi Familia Americana

Apostolia Pentogenis examines the life of an undocumented Mexican worker whose children are growing up American.

Apostolia Pentogenis

Carlos is a new dad for the second time around and like any other loving father wants the best for his two children. He tries to make sure they eat right, do well in school, and stay healthy. But his new daughter has something he doesn't: American citizenship.

Carlos may be like any other dad in how he cares for his family, but he is an undocumented immigrant in the eyes of the U.S. government. He came to America from Mexico seven years ago after he had his first child, Carlos Junior, with his wife, Angela. And it's been a decision that has tormented him ever since.

"Some times I wake up early in the morning and just look over at my wife in bed and I cry," Carlos recounts softly in broken English. He often finds himself emotional when he thinks of the trust his family has put into him to follow him to America. His marriage to Angela in Mexico was an untraditional event, more like a leap of faith. They dated briefly and wed the same night Carlos proposed to her. Since then, Angela has been devoted to her husband. That is why one year ago Angela and Carlos Jr. crossed the Mexican-American border to live with Carlos in New York.

At the thought of her amazing loyalty, Carlos asks his wife, "Why do you love me?" Angela is too shy to reply but wouldn't have attempted to answer in English anyway. She is perfectly unassimilated with American culture, English language, even New York City. Carlos admits it has been a tough adjustment for her, but tries to help her from feeling lonely. Angela doesn't have a job, very few friends, and her closest family lives a busy life another state away. Their son, on the other hand, couldn't be a happier child.

A playful 8 year-old, Carlos Jr. likes to laugh and run around with his friends. Shy at first like his mother, he warms up to a stranger by drawing little pictures or enticing them to play a game with him. Carlos is thankful for his son's good humor and knows exactly why the rambunctious child is doing so well. "He thinks this is all a game," Carlos explains. Although crossing the desert border by van and foot with his mother and cousins would have proven to be traumatic to any child, Carlos Jr. took it as an adventure.

"When they first got here, I took them to the park and he (junior) saw a cop walking around and hid under a bench shouting ‘'Immigration, Immigration!'" Junior thought he still had to run from the US Immigration and Naturalization Service that patrolled the boarder he had recently illegally crossed. Carlos Jr. had to be coaxed out of hiding but it took him a while to stop playing cops and robbers; or rather, INS and immigrants. Even the traffic helicopters that often circle the city would invoke a chase. Carlos Jr. would see them and start running from the "mosquitos," the name given to Immigration search choppers also used to police the Mexican-American border.

The newest addition to the family, Sondra, brings Carlos all the world's joy but causes him a lot of doubt. "I try to be tough so when people look at me, they see that I am strong," but Carlos knows that he is more than uncertain in what the future holds for his family.

Sondra is officially American because she was born in a New York hospital. Her citizenship is a great source of pride that Carlos can't even put into words when asked. But it also creates tension in his family. Angela and Carlos often disagree about whether they should raise her in America and Carlos Jr. often becomes jealous over the attention his little sister receives. Carlos even faces conflict with himself because he knows that in order to file for his daughter's passport, he will have to come forward as an illegal immigrant himself. Having an American child wasn't the purpose of Angela's reunion with him in New York, but it was a happy surprise that has now left a lot of questions begging to be answered.

"I want my kids to know my home in Mexico" Carlos explains as a reason to bring them back across the boarder. But at the same time, Carlos Jr. is doing well in their neighborhood public school. Carlos didn't encounter any problems enrolling his son into grade school because in America, every child is obligated to go to school –- no questions asked. It is only when continuing education to a secondary school, like community college, Carlos Jr. may encounter problems enrolling without proof of citizenship.

More reasons keep Carlos in New York. He came to America on his own seven years ago to provide a better life for his family but over that course of time, he has grown to like New York. It's a different life style from the traditionally small town he came from. He explains, "Here, you just do what you want. You don't ask anyone and no one looks at what you do."

Coming from humble origins, Carlos may not be any richer than he once was, but he feels freer to do what he wants and more independent from the watchful eye of his family back in his hometown. He and his wife used to live with his parents in cramped quarters in Mexico but now Carlos puts his money towards renting space in a house with a backyard for his kids to play.

They still share the space with six other adults who happen to be distant family members, but they are mostly gone for work all day, leaving Angela, junior, and Sondra free-reign over the household. Having that space means a lot to Carlos and it represents his emphasis on being independent.

Adhering to her promise to stay by her husband's side, Angela takes the position to stand by Carlos' decisions but even she at times get frustrated with their move to America. She lives a confined life caring for her children and hasn't expressed any interest in getting to know New York.

Although Carlos has repeatedly tried to show her how to use public transportation and has encouraged her to go out more, she has resisted learning anything that isn't necessary to taking care of her family. She won't even go shopping without Carlos and doesn't try to speak Spanish to anyone she doesn't know.

It's a harsh existence and Carlos hopes that with time, she will allow herself to get comfortable with her surroundings. Hiring a babysitter so Angela can go back to work may be an option that Carlos believes will help make her feel that she has more of a purpose in New York. Both Carlos and Angela have worked with flowers their whole lives and it's a job they enjoyed doing together in Mexico. Carlos currently works as a floral designer in a busy florist and he often thinks about working side by side with his wife again.

Angela became pregnant with Sondra not too long after she was reunited with Carlos in New York. Seeking medical treatment during her pregnancy was scary for her since she doesn't speak English and often had to visit the hospital by herself while Carlos was at work. There also came a moment of concern close to her giving birth because doctors were concerned that the baby was underweight. But Sondra was born without any complications at the hospital. All in all, Angela says her experience at the hospital was "comfortable". Carlos was there for Sondra's birth and believes the staff at the hospital was very cooperative.

Language is a topic of concern for Carlos. At home, his family only speaks Spanish but he wants his kids to learn English. Carlos Jr. attends a bilingual second grade class at school and his teacher encourages him to practice English. But Carlos feels inferior when attempting to help with his son's homework. He also feels short on time to be available for his children and wife.

Getting to work for Carlos involves a long commute to New Jersey six days a week for a full-time job. The travel time can often take up hours of his day, as he has to transfer between trains and buses to reach his destination at a small florist a little over an hour outside of New York.

A family-run mom and pop shop pays him in cash weekly. Given this, Carlos is mostly not home. And on his one day off, Sunday, Carlos struggles to share his time, "If I am with him (junior) all day, then my wife is alone. And if the baby cries, she needs me. Then he (junior) gets jealous." It's a delicate balancing act that doesn't always work out smoothly. Carlos does admit he and his wife fight from time to time but they are still very much in love and work hard to raise their family.

Carlos doesn't know what he sees for his family in the future. He wants Sondra to grow up healthy and Carlos to stay in school and out of trouble with the gangs in the neighborhood. He also hopes Angela will grow to become more comfortable with her new home but he hasn't ruled out returning to Mexico. The only thing that is certain for Carlos is that many more emotional nights lay ahead for him as he tries to figure out how to be a good father and husband to his American daughter and Mexican wife and son.